Party, Party, Party Let's Get Wasted

I like a good partay. No, I love a good party.

I looooooove laughing and talking and sippy sipping and having a good ole time with my friends and family.

But errr uhhh whenever I see a guy in a car with those yellowish Ohio plates, I always think, let me get waaaaay awaaaay if it is at night -- party time. And then I get to stinking about the Scarlet Letter and how Hester had the big A on her chest. The A stood for adulterer. I read the book in high school but it's a good read.

Any who. The banana plates, party plates or the party, party, party let's all get wasted plates are sorta a symbol to let the whole world know that the driver drinks, yes, indulges a bit tooo much a bit tooo often.

But are the plates to shame the person or to make others know? Hmmmmmm

Both, I think because honestly when I see them I'm trying to get a peek at the driver and then driving away, waaaaaay awaaaaay just in case he or she has had a few.

But what do these yellow plates do for relationships? Good googly moogly, I hate to say it but I just don't think the banana plates go over well in dating situations. What do you think?

Do Photos Of Exs Mean Anything?

When a relationship gets on skidrow and ends up in a crash, what's the first thing people do?

Ummmm for me, I get rid of everything that reminds me of that person, clothes, photos, artifacts LOLOLOLOL everything. The photos I have in my home are of people I love. People who make me smile. People who mean something to my life soooooo because an ex no longer means anything, I am grabbing up all his STUFF and heave hoin it into the trash. LOLOLOLOL

Nah, I'm not that dramatic but I certainly do remove things that serve as reminders.

I'm a card person so I keep every single card given to me. Period. Birthday cards. Sweetest Day cards. Thinking About You cards. Forgive Me cards. And yea, I keep letters and notes, too. I'm sentimental.

As I scan my collection of photos, I have my nieces, nephews, my bff and her husband, my gf and her husband, my gf, gf, gf, gf, me and my gfs, my parents, my sisters. Oh my, I do not have a photo of my brother! Wow! I have a photo of my neice and nephew from my wedding. It's sooo old but I love it and it's cute. They look soooo innocent.

But does having a photo set out or hanging in your home of your ex gf or bf mean anything? Is it good or bad? Explain.

Your Single Friends Can Get You Into Trouble

Over the weekend, I had an interesting conversation with a gf about singles hanging with married people.

I used to be married so my perspective is simple -- in everything, life is a juggling act. This means, one cannot do too much of anything, including hanging with single friends.

I believe that I am a good influence on all my friends, whether they are married or single, because I always look at the glass half full. Yeppers, I am an optimist.

Soooo if one of my friends is dealing with an issue in a marriage or a relationship or a dating situation, I try to find the good in it. I prolly do this a little bit too much actually, but this is my personality.

Any who.

There was a recent incident with one of my married friends and her husband said to her I betcha if it had been them they would not have still been hanging with you, meaning the friend would have been with her man.

And ummmm he is right. Women like to be with their man when they have one and a man who is really interested in a woman wants to spend most of his free time with her. Can I get an Amen from the choir? LOLOLOLOL

But when a person gets married, I don't think that he or she has to abandon their single friends but ummmm they can't be ripping and running with them as if they were single.

Really this means, a married person has to pick and choose the events and outings that they want to attend. After all, if you are with the person of your dreams, you should really want to spend the bulk of your time with him or her.

Amen! Amen! LOLOLOLOLOL

What are your thoughts? Should married people hang out with single people? Should they limit how many tmes they go out? Share your thoughts with me.

Guys I Date Cannot Eat Pork

There are sooooo many reality TV shows out now and I have to admit that I am one of those people who are feeding the craziness.

I like a lot of reality TV shows. The Kardashians, Kendra, Housewives (the city doesn't matter), Still Standing, For The Love Of Ray J, and others that I cannot think of the title to right now.

Last night, I caught "What Chili Wants" on VH-1. I'm a major TLC fan and absolutely adored the trio and the ladies' style in the 90s. So "What Chili Wants" grabbed my attention.

The show is centered around her looking for love and she has a love coach/matchmaker trying to help her find it.

In the episode that I caught, she raddled off a list. He can't drink, smoke, eat pork. He has to have a six pack abdomen and a few other things.

But eat pork, eat pork. Wowsa Yowsa. I can see no drunks allowed and no dragon breaths but peeps care about what folks eat when deciding if he or she is dating. Oh my!

OK, I don't eat steak or lobster but would a guy care ummmm I don't think so. Well, maybe he would care because of the tab when he would take me out to dinner, but the pork thing totally blew me away.

I don't think I would have been as shocked if she would have just said follows a balanced nutritional diet because quiet as it is kept a lot of men eat what they want, drink what they want and do what they want and then fall ill and look to the Wifey Nurse or the Girlfriend Nurse or the Live With Me Nurse to take care of them. I'm just sayin..... :)

And don't go getting mad at me fellas. You know it's the truth and plus men in their 40s and beyond are the ones who fall victim to high blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol, heart disease and all that so I feel Chili wanting a man that she will not have to be a Nurse to.

But does it matter what a person eats when you are looking for love? Do you care if a person exercises and eats right? Do you have any one food in mine that he or she could not eat such as pork? Tell me.

Celibacy Has Its Rewards

I remember when one of my gfs told me she was celibate.

I looked at her and tried not to let it show on my face what I was thinking. I am an offender of this often. As hard as I tried, I could not conceal my feelings.

My mouf opened. My eyes just about popped outta my head and my expression was "What You Talkin' Bout Willis?"

I could not believe it. She had a boyfriend and a serious boyfriend -- like going to the Chapel soon type of boyfriend -- but they were very active in the church and had made a vow to be celibate. Sooooo they were celibate.

Although I was shocked that there was no hanky panky, I found it admirable. As a matter of fact, I starting rubbing her back because I wanted to feel those angel wings. LOLOLOLOL

But I was curious, curious, curious, ummmm I mean curious, so I asked if they got hot and heavy into kissing was it hard to say wooooooo Nelly, wooooooo Nelly. LOLOLOLOLOL

She said Yes.

I asked do they fool around with fingers and other pieces and parts to get each other there, you know, there.

She said No.

I asked if she could dry hump. LOLOLOL

I can't remember the answer because she was laffin at me soooo hard and I was laffin at myself.

After the giggles ceased, she explained that her commitment to be celibate was about her Christian walk. Period. It was hard but she was willing to be obedient for God's favor.

OK, OK, OK.

But I would be lying if I said I can totally understand that type of discipline especially when a person has someone that he or she is digging.

With that said, I don't think a lot of people make a decision to be celibate. I think it happens because they are either in a drought and cannot find anyone they deem worthy.

What do you think? What do you think causes people to decide to become celibate.

And my gf walked down the aisle a while ago and is really, really happy with her marriage and her action and satisfaction. Holla! LOLOLOLOLOL

Uggg! Guys Should Not Wear Hoop Earrings

I don't know if hoop earrings for men is a style that is making a resurgence or not but I do NOT like it.

I have seen a few guys lately with hoop earrings. One guy had two hoops. I must admit that when I was younger I had a problem with a man who wore two earrings but then I let go of my old-fashioned ways. And shooooot, I even started liking both ears pierced on men.

I have to say that I like plain earrings...plain diamonds, plain studs. The massive, decorative earrings that sparkle and shine are not the business. You know the ones that have a bunch of little bitty diamonds. Oh my, I hate those earrings on men.

I also do NOT like braids on men but errrr uhh that is another whole topic.

Any who.

A nice diamond, even a CZ (it is a recession), in a man's ear is enough.

A nice watch speaks volumes, volumes ya hear me. Oooooweeee, a nice watch is, to me, a status symbol. Nah, it doesn't have to be a Rolex but it doesn't have to come from the bubble gum machine either. LOLOLOLOLOL

And then one bracelet. I've been seeing tooooooo many guys wearing a lot of bracelets, the strings, the this, the that on their wrists. One bracelet fellas. I have a confession in this department too. I hate to see a woman with bracelets all the way up to their elbows. LOLOLOLOLOL

Less is more to moi.

And chains or necklace. Eight is NOT enough. One is enough. One. Uno. It should be on the thicker, masculine looking side LOLOLOLOLOL

So you know my opinion :) What are your thoughts? And should men wear ankle bracelets? Tell me.

Did You Know The "Man Rules"

This e-mail is being passed on through cyberspace and it was soooooo funny to me that I could not resist sharing. I also think that men are really this simple. LOLOLOLOL

The Man Rules

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

Finally, the guys' side of the story.

(I must admit, it's pretty good.)

We always hear "the rules" From the female side....Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!


Please note.. these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!



1. Men are NOT mind readers.
(FIRST & FOREMOST RULE)

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you
leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports, It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints
do not work!

Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable
answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.

That's what we do.. Sympathy is what
your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.

We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.

We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle..

1. If you ask a question you don't wantan answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Football or Hockey.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know
men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh.

Emotional Support Is Priceless

A good man is hard to find, but a good man who is emotionally supportive is even harder to find.

As a divorcee, I often think about what is most important to me and recently I had to pay my ex-husband a compliment. I told him that I appreciated the financial support through the years. Of course, of course I appreciated that :)

He was second to none as a provider. Heck, he may have been better than my very own father....nah, that's going a bit too far but he was great in that department.

He constantly looked out for me and was truly the head of the household. We used to tease about him being the CEO and I was the CEO's assistant because I cooked, cleaned and played the traditional wife role superbly if I must say so myself. :)

Any who.

While financial support is a great thing, I am one of those chickypoos who needs emotional support. Yep, my name is Darlene Jeter and I need emotional support and for those people who have problems with critical thinking that does NOT mean that I don't need financial support LOLOLOLOLOL

Losers, Users and Dead Beats did you her that announcement over the intercom? Listen closely.

"Guys who don't want to step up and take your proper role, exit to the rear and to the left. Thank You."

Any who.

A kind word for me is like hitting the jackpot. And wow, a kind word said when a kind word is really needed to get through a difficult time is jicky, jicky jackpot. I need it...period.

Some people are not good or even fair in the emotional support department. I witnessed this recently when a gf's husband was ill. She carried on and on and on just like usual.

For me, I would have stopped, dropped and rolled because I would expect a person to stop, drop and roll for me. You know the Cardinal Rule -- Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You.

But it became clear, really crystal clear, to me that all people do not have the emotional capacity to be emotionally supportive. She certainly didn't that day, but we are going to take a course at the Diggity Institute on Gaining Emotional Capacity. LOLOLOLOL

And what must be stressed is emotional support is not pity. Just say something nice, do something nice when you know a person is going through a difficult patch in life.

Soooooo with that said, the next time your significant other is not feeling well or had a rough day at work, say something danggone nice, go get some ice cream, rub his or her feet and chat, go for a stroll in the park or give a diggity certificate. For goodness sake, show some emotional support.

Do you think you are emotionally supportive? Give an example of when you have been emotionally supportive.

He Wasn't Soooo Cute Without A Hat

My friends often say you are a fool. And yea, I am soooo with that said I must share a story of when I met a guy.

When I shared the story with my friends everyone was gasping for air and falling on the floor.

OK, OK, OK.

I meet this guy and he is dressed really nice. Nice shoes -- two points. Nice pants -- two points. Nice shirt -- two points. Nice arms -- four points. Yea, I am an arm girl so extra points given for nice arms. I am doing the mathy math and everything seems to be adding up A-OK. He is a nice brown complexion, height is cool, nice eyes and lips, yea, yea, yea but errr uhhhh!

He takes off his hat and good googly mooogly, I thought an alien took over his body. Whatda? Whatda? Whatda?

This dude just starred in the blockbuster, "Wear a Hat and Fool Women Into Believing You Are Good Looking."

He had a receding hairline and I don't like making fun of the shapes of peeps heads but this dude's head was let's just say not round, YIKES!

But not only was he starring in the blockbuster movie, so was I and I was playing the role of the lady who screams at the top of her lungs and runs through the woods but cannot get away. LOLOLOLOL

Any who.

This isn't the only person I've met who has turned out to be an ug-mo without sunglasses or without a hat or in the dark.

Have you ever met someone and thought they were nice looking until dunt-A-don he or she took off a hat or sunglasses? Share your story with me.

Can You Stay Faithful During Sickness?

I remember my gf telling me a story about one of her friends who was stepping out on her husband. This particular gf's husband had been ill and was unable to perform.

I do not remember for sure the illness but I think it was cancer.

The woman had attempted to remain faithful but found it impossible.

This conversation segways into another topic of cheating when someone's husband is unable to please.

And wouldn't ya know it...another gf chimes in about one of her friends cheating on her husband because he just did not do the do correctamungo for her.

Wowsa Yowsa!

It happens evday but how in the heckypoo do you get married to a person and don't like the diggity? Although I detected and suspected that error DI, lololololo ummmm I mean erectile dysfunction played a role.

Any who.

I don't think peeps who are not married would stick around too long after pieces and parts do not work, but dang your spouse? But I guess peeps have needs soooooo would you expect your significant other to remain faithful if you could no longer perform due to illness or injury? Be honest :)

Do You Have A Timeline In Your Relationship?

Although life has not taught me everything about love and relationships, it certainly has taught me not to put a timeline on a relationship.

I remember when I was in my 20s and dating the man who ultimately became my ex-husband. I was crazy in love and worshipped the ground he walked on....fo real, fo real.

We had dated for about 5 years and I wanted to be married, period! As one of my friends often says, "It was no longer under investigation." I loved him, he loved me and that was all that was needed or so I thought.

Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carrey's breakup after 5 years took me back to that place of 5 years of dating when I sooooooo wanted to be married. I'm not saying that this caused Jim and Jenny's breakup, but the 5 year mark is more so what got me thinking of my past.

It seemed like Jim and Jenny were happy. But who knows what was really going on behind closed doors?

Any who.

Their decision to split sent me on a self journey. I do that quite often :) So I was thinking about why did I think that at 5 years that the marriage magician should step in and work its wonders. I wondered why it was at 5 years and not 2 years or 1 year or 3 years? What the heck made 5 years the number that made me eagerly want to take the marital plunge?

I kinda came to the conclusion that immaturity and love are an incredible combination. It is what makes people run off and get married. It is what makes people forget about everything in their lives except him or her. It is powerful.

And while my self journey didn't really offer any concrete answers, I still wonder what made me do what I did. Love is crazy but who knows :)

Do you think that there should be a time limit placed on relationships? Should a person know if they want to get married by a certain amount of years?

Does Your Spouse Lie To You About Money?

Some peeps will believe just about anything! With that said, I was left shaking my head after ear hustling a conversation.

Long story short...a guy believes his wife has not gotten paid after working more than a month. Whadda, whadda, whadda?

Seems to me that somebody takes his head off at night and sets it on the nightstand cause this sounds like madness and only a person without a head could believe this story.

But errr uhhhhh, I think a lot of peeps lie about money soooooooo it is no surprise that money/finances break up a lot of relationships.

Although my mom taught me that a smart woman squirrels away money for a rainy day. As a matter a fact, she had an emergency $50 in her purse when I was a little girl :)

Any who.

I am not sure what makes people lie about money but this big bodacious lie of not getting paid after a month is ridiculous.

Do you lie about money to your significant other? What makes people lie so much about money?

Do Wedding Rings Really Matter?

I had a very interesting conversation with someone recently about the whole phenomenon of wearing a wedding ring.

It appears that men, at least this is what I have been told, are more attractive to women once they begin wearing a wedding ring.

This made my blood boil a little but I guess hoes, are hoes are hoes...lolol Of course, I am talking about the tool used for gardening.

Any who.

During the conversation, I learned that men do pay attention to the size of the ring and assesses the man. Sorta like women do. You know when a girl first gets engage and everyone says, "He did good girl!" Ususally this means the ring is pretty nice.

When men look at a woman's ring, men who are possibly interested may say, "Nah, I cannot afford that chickypoo."

But the one thing that I found most interesting was how men will assume that a woman is married if she wears a ring that looks like a wedding ring on the left hand, even if it is the middle finger.

This also goes for when a woman wears that same style of ring on the right hand.

Wowsa Yowsa. I was told that if a man gives a woman a quick look and ladies, you know there is stiff competition, lololol -- a ring can cause a lot of confusion.

After the conversation, I pondered a bit. I think a lot of women wear rings to confuse men, but I'm wondering could women be wearing a ring and not understand how it could affect her dating life?

Do you think men take enough time to figure out if the ring is on the ring finger? Do you think women are more attracted to men who wear wedding rings?